Rejection is a part of life. We all have to learn to cope with rejection from an early age. It is an important part of learning to become a rounded, functioning human being. From the early playground humiliation of not being invited to a birthday party or being the last to be selected for the sports team rejection is something that we have to learn to take in our stride.
Sometimes people learn about rejection in their home environment. If a new brother or sister comes along, they may have to learn to moderate their demands on a busy mother who is often preoccupied with the new baby.
Relationships with others often include many times and ways of learning to deal with rejection. Finding our friends, lovers, partners often includes many experiences of rejection before we find that special someone with whom we relate to on a comfortable basis.
But there are several ways of learning to cope with rejection whilst remaining a confident, balanced human being.
- Learn not to take things personally. Often rejection is not about you. It is about the other person and their feelings, fears, thoughts. They may be busy, stressed, distracted or depressed and as a result not have the time or energy to be able to accommodate anything or anyone outside of their immediate situation.
- Use humour. Not taking situations too seriously can be an attractive quality. Being self-deprecating or funny can change the perspective on a potentially difficult situation. And in truth, all people dread being rejected. We all know how it feels, so when someone is making light of being rejected most people will respond in a supportive and positive way. They will be on your side.
- Do not put all your eggs in one basket. Ensure that you have several groups of friends, different interests that occupy and entertain you. This has the twofold advantage of firstly allowing you to appear busy and interesting and also secondly of not always being available for anything and everything. Being busy and a little elusive can be an attractive quality to others.
- Do things that make you feel good, that you are good at, that you enjoy. Fun is important. Including your particular talents in your life, either in a work or a social environment helps you to feel good. That way you remind yourself of how capable and skilled you are. No one can take that away from you and reminding yourself of this can reinforce the fact that there are many good things that you do that enhance your quality of life.
- Do things that boost your confidence, that you get good feedback from. Find the things that you enjoy and do well. Make a point of including those things in your life and they will reinforce your confidence levels on a regular basis.
- Accept praise. Many people shrug off compliments and praise, but accepting it gracefully encourages others to see you positively and allows yourself to accept good feedback and take it on board.
- Look good. Even on a budget it is possible to look smart, clean and tidy. That way, rejection may have occurred but it does not define how you look or determine how you present yourself to others. By looking good you demonstrate that the rejection is just one small experience that you are moving on from, and moving on from with your head held high.
Reference: Susan_Leigh
Sometimes people learn about rejection in their home environment. If a new brother or sister comes along, they may have to learn to moderate their demands on a busy mother who is often preoccupied with the new baby.
Relationships with others often include many times and ways of learning to deal with rejection. Finding our friends, lovers, partners often includes many experiences of rejection before we find that special someone with whom we relate to on a comfortable basis.
But there are several ways of learning to cope with rejection whilst remaining a confident, balanced human being.
- Learn not to take things personally. Often rejection is not about you. It is about the other person and their feelings, fears, thoughts. They may be busy, stressed, distracted or depressed and as a result not have the time or energy to be able to accommodate anything or anyone outside of their immediate situation.
- Use humour. Not taking situations too seriously can be an attractive quality. Being self-deprecating or funny can change the perspective on a potentially difficult situation. And in truth, all people dread being rejected. We all know how it feels, so when someone is making light of being rejected most people will respond in a supportive and positive way. They will be on your side.
- Do not put all your eggs in one basket. Ensure that you have several groups of friends, different interests that occupy and entertain you. This has the twofold advantage of firstly allowing you to appear busy and interesting and also secondly of not always being available for anything and everything. Being busy and a little elusive can be an attractive quality to others.
- Do things that make you feel good, that you are good at, that you enjoy. Fun is important. Including your particular talents in your life, either in a work or a social environment helps you to feel good. That way you remind yourself of how capable and skilled you are. No one can take that away from you and reminding yourself of this can reinforce the fact that there are many good things that you do that enhance your quality of life.
- Do things that boost your confidence, that you get good feedback from. Find the things that you enjoy and do well. Make a point of including those things in your life and they will reinforce your confidence levels on a regular basis.
- Accept praise. Many people shrug off compliments and praise, but accepting it gracefully encourages others to see you positively and allows yourself to accept good feedback and take it on board.
- Look good. Even on a budget it is possible to look smart, clean and tidy. That way, rejection may have occurred but it does not define how you look or determine how you present yourself to others. By looking good you demonstrate that the rejection is just one small experience that you are moving on from, and moving on from with your head held high.
Reference: Susan_Leigh
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